i hate it when i have something to say but i couldnt make out the words.
how easily people could generate those feelings and emotions into words.
im not gifted with that.
i find it so hard to "talk it out", even to my boyfriend im facing that..

but i know..
deep inside im hurt, im sad by whatever that had happened or happening to me.
just too many emotions going on..
at times, i reached the point of breaking down
and just wannna shout at every single of of those faces that causes pain on me.
maybe then i feel better??
idk.

i tried bridging the gap..
i tried, too many times..
the more i tried, the bigger the gap will get..

its just painful..
when i lose someone..for good.
its painful to lose people whom you love & respect.

im sorry if anyone feel the pinch..
i didnt mean it.
the gap is too big..
beyond my control and anyone's control..

im just reverting to my oldself..
keeping everyting to myself and smile to even those who cause so much pain on me.
but again, im used to it..